Wednesday, 2 June 2010

Hot Sauce Caution

My good friend Mr Ricky Patel over at Fuzzification is on the move and passed on to me a recent experience of his regarding hot sauce:

"Here is a little story I thought I'd share with you. It's a bit of a cautionary tale, you might want to share with your readers...


Since I'm on the verge of vacating my apartment for a life of semi-homelessness and Nomad-ery, I've been cleaning and getting rid of things. Today I was scrubbing the kitchen, and it was time to start going through my fridge for discardables.

I bumped into our old friend "3rd Degree Sauce". A long time ago I had bought two of these giant jugs of sauce (One of which I gave to Wing King). To be honest, I really didn't use a whole lot of it. I quickly grew to dislike the sauce. It was too garish for my palette as I tended to more flavorful spice concoctions (as those found in my native Indian cuisine). So there in the bottom of my fridge the jug sat. Once in a while I'd bring it out to see if it had started to grow mold or spoil (as it was well past its best before date) but the sauce remained as the day it was opened. On a few occasions I had offered it to friends and the Wing King*, but no one wanted this offensive beast in their fridge.

Which brings me to today. It was the day that the sauce would make a permanent exit from my life. Little did I know that the sauce would not go quietly. The jug was far too full to just toss into the recycling bin and my environmental sensibilities prevented me from tossing into the trash. So it was decided that it would be poured down the drain (along with the contents of a few ancient jars of Tandoori paste). The jug took some effort to open as it had crusted tight, but it yielded under my might. I upended it in the sink with hot water on full, which proved to be my undoing.

Like a punch in the face, the capsaicin laced steam hit me in the face and I immediately began to cough. My eyes began to water and my mouth even began to burn. As I coughed I inhaled this cloud of acrid steam into my lungs. I ran for the balcony and some fresh air. As I gasped for life, I had this feeling that somewhere the devil was laughing at my contempt for his fiery sauce.

Ricky. "

* WK note: I was still working on the original bottle he generously gave me.


Teena in Toronto said...

Sounds too powerful for me :)

Lord of the Wings said...

Teena - For must of us I think!

Chris said...

Hilarious story and yes, a most cautionary tale! Hopefully Ricky's sinus linings suffered no permanent damage!

Lord of the Wings said...

Chris - I think he's doing better now . . . I think