THE CHESTNUT REPORT (the T is silent, bitch)

"Stop operating heavy machinery, because you're about to take two maximum strength tablets of Truthi Wings!"

One of the benefits of living in my rez is that I am guaranteed twice a month to be fed a chicken wing dinner. Tonight was one of those great nights. Although I have reviewed the Chestnut Tree (the fightin Chestnut Tree) wings before (HERE , HERE & HERE), I have decided to talk about them again because they are never the same twice, but they are always oh so good.

So welcome to

Part III of our 20 Part Series: Better Know a Chestnut Wing

The excellent kitchen staff at Chestnut strive to improve the student food experience, and the wing is a top priority. In the photo above, you can see Nathan, the Sous Chef for Chestnut (second from the right), who also designed the Suicide Sauce that is featured prominently in this review.

I sat down with Nathan (and by sitting down, I mean I talked to him through the kitchen window) about the wings and the sauce. First thing he did when he saw me was to get me my usual: "double order just wings, right?" Right. I like that they know the wing king when they see one.

Yesterday he gave me the number of wings they cook up in one night, but after processing the number, I thought, 'no way I heard that right'. I asked again tonight and the answer was the same: "Over 850 pounds of wings tonight". Thats right - to service a building of 1000 you need approx 9000 wings. I took full advantage of the all-you-can-eat since I ate more than 20 wings myself.

The wings came on the counter with plain and BBQ - but I went with the BBQ with suicide on the side. The suicide was serve your self, and I helped myself to a generous portion. But only on half; the sauce looked good but I didn't want to take a complete leap of faith and douse them all. I also brought my squeeze bottle of 3rd Degree with me as well, just in case.

While talking to Nathan in line, several students were daring each other to try the suicide. One even made a $10 bet that his friend couldn't handle it. Why does no one make these bets with me?

Well, I filled my tumbler with coke, got a bowl full of water for washing, and off to join Kerry, Juliana and Jane - none of whom got wings. 2 out of 3 of them don't like wings. Ya I can't believe it either, but there are crazier people out there.

The suicide sauce was good. Damn good. It had a lot of flavour, and it had a bite that the average wing mortal would fall victim to. For me, it was a mild tingle, but I enjoyed the texture and the aroma that came from it. When I went back for a second order, I asked Nathan what the sauce was. He said it was a 3-part sauce essentially: 2 parts Frank's Red Hot, 1 part BBQ sauce and addition of several smaller powders and sauces including habenero pepper (the real heat behind this sauce), Mr Gouda's and others. He said it could have been made even hotter, but it would have lost the flavour and have been simply heat.

So would I describe these as "Great Caf Wings, or Greatest Caf Wings?" I would definitely have to say greatest. Spicy, tasty, battered and baked, Chestnut wings are the ones to take. So I give a Tip of the Hat to these wings, and a Wag of the Finger to those that haven't tried them: Jane, Kerry and Juliana - YOU'RE ON NOTICE!