Wednesday 4 February 2009

What Would Brian Boitano Do???

A small trip down memory lane - its the summer of 1999, and I had just seen the greatest musical movie of all time. South Park - Bigger, Longer, Uncut.

While at that time I wasn't a huge fan of South Park before the film, I certainly was after. In fact, I went out and bought the soundtrack (and I rarely bought CD's). I listened to it over and over.
There were many sound tracks that became famous, "Blame Canada""Uncle Fucka" and "Kyle's Mom is a Big Fat Bitch", there was one song that always had a special place in my heart.

"What Would Brian Boitano Do? Part II". No not the song in the movie itself, but a remix found near the end of the CD. After a painful search, I finally found the music video. And the reason for this version being so important? No I'm not a Brian Boitano fan. Watch the video and pay close attention at 1:25 mark in the song. (be advised, there is profanity, and the images are lagging a bit from the music itself for some reason)
[Singers:]Brian! Skate! Brian! Skate! Brian! Fight! Brian! Skate!
[Lead Singer:]
What would Brian Boitano do if he was here right now? He'd make a plan and he'd follow through. That's what Brian Boitano'd do.
Brian! Skate! Brian! Fight!
When Brian Boitano was in the Olympics skating for the gold, he did two solchows and a triple lutz while wearing ablindfold. When Brian Boitano was in the Alps fighting grizzly bears, he used his magical fire-breath and saved the maidens,fair.
Brian! S-s-skate! Brian! Live!
So what would Brian Boitano'd do if he was here today? I'm sure he'd kick an arse or two. That's what Brian Boitano'd do.
Brian! Skate! Brian! Live!
When Brian Boitano traveled through time to the year 3010, he fought the evil robot king and saved us all agian. When BrianBoitano built the pyramids, he beat up Kounlah Khan! Cause Brian Boitano doesn't take shit from an-y-bo-dy!
[Man In Back:]
No! Brian! Those chicken wings are really spicy! Don't eat those!
[Singers:]
I've never seen a man eat so many chicken wings. I've never seen a man eat so many chicken wings. I've never seen a man eatso many chicken wings.
[man:]
AAAHHHH! I've never seen a man eat so many chicken wings! AAAHHHH! I've never seen a man EAT SOMANY CHICKEN WINGS!! AAAHHHH!! I'VE NEVER SEEN A MAN EAT SO MANY CHICKEN WINGS!!! AAAHHHH!!! I'VE NEVER SEEN A MAN EAT SOMANY CHICKEN WINGS!!!!
Brian! Skate! Brian! Fight!
Brain Boitano-o was born on the planet of Krynuk. He came to Earth to save us all from borans and unstuck. Hideedodee!
Hideeday! Brian Boitano's here. So round up all your lasses and tell 'em they have no fears. Say, "Come over here my honey,and come and I'll take off my pants. and I'm gonna make dirty love to you, cause that's what Brian Boitano'd do."
Cause that's what Brian Boitano'd DO!

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